Halloween certainly creeped up on us this year. And let’s face it, we are not prepared. The kids have changed their costumes five times and counting, we’re already out of candy (OK that may be our fault), and that Halloween party we planned? It’s not even close to organized.
But whatever your own worries are for the spookiest holiday of the year, do not fear! __parents everywhere are just as frightened for this Halloween, and it has nothing to do with witches or monsters.
So take a break from all the planning and enjoy a few laughs from these oh, so relatable Halloween-themed parenting tweets.
1. It would be a lot easier.
Do we have to Trick or Treat?! Can't I just take the kids to the store and buy them bags of candy?
— Jen Good (@buriedwithkids) October 31, 2014
2. Bats make the best party accessories.
…..that time a real bat was flying around my house and I was like, "hey bat, can you come back for my party in a couple weeks?"
— Kelly Clarkson (@kelly_clarkson) October 13, 2016
3. We estimate: 3,587,612 Elsas.
I have started rehearsing my Halloween surprise face every time an Elsa knocks on my door. #Halloween #Parenting
— noelle (@BowChicaBowMom) October 29, 2014
4. Um that would be kind of fantastic.
My kids greatest desire would be to have Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas decorations up…all at once…all year long.
— Jessica (@DocWife) October 13, 2016
5. We’d rather watch a scary movie.
The scariest thing I've experienced this Halloween season is my 4-year-old detailing the girl/friendship drama in her pre-k.
— Kate Spencer (@katespencer) October 26, 2015
6. Fair trade-off.
And now we play a little game called "I made you, you shall repay me with candy."
— Carbosly (@Carbosly) November 1, 2014
7. Well, excuse you.
4: "Mom, you can dress up as this cool girl for Halloween…even though you aren't cool, you can pretend."
*writes her out of will
— Mama babbles… (@mama_babble) October 19, 2016
8. Visitors not welcome.
Our door decoration for Halloween says "Enter at your own risk" but it seems like sound advice year round.
— heather boo* (@heatherlou_) October 12, 2016
9. We hate to say we told you so …
dad, I think a ghost is in my room
-the ghost in the scary movie I said not to watch?
yes
-well good luck. that thing's freaky. goodnight
— Andy H. (@AndyAsAdjective) October 7, 2015
10. Ouch.
One time I wore my brother's t-shirt, and my dad asked if I was dressing up as his favorite child for Halloween.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) October 20, 2016
11. It’s basically the same thing.
To save $45 on a pumpkin I'm trying to convince my 2yr old that they grow on cement & this store parking lot really is the pumpkin patch.
— SingleBabyMama (@_SingleBabyMama) October 11, 2016
12. Close enough.
Me: What is Aydan going to be for Halloween?
Mom: The flashman, flashlight something like that
Me:…— Veevz (@salty_vivi) October 16, 2016
13. How do you like that, kids?
I decided that for Halloween, I'll go as a toddler and just say no all day long.
No.
That feels good.
— Domestic Goddess (@DomesticGoddss) October 22, 2015
14. Let’s hope not.
We're 4 weeks out from Halloween and I'm at peak anxiety that this will be the year my kids figure out how delicious peanut butter cups are.
— Mike Reynolds (@EverydayGirlDad) October 5, 2016
15. Makes sense.
My kid forgot I asked her to clean up her toys 5 mins ago, but not that she asked me to dress up as DJ Lance Rock for Halloween 3 weeks ago.
— Doyin Richards (@daddydoinwork) October 17, 2014
16. Beware.
This Halloween I am gonna pop out and scare people with a copy of my mortgage payment. Terrifying
— ivy•cheeks (@collabeans620) October 17, 2016
17. We hope you learned your lesson.
13:How many of my M&M's did you eat.
Me: 2
13: …
Me: 4
13: I'm not mad at you Momma, I'm just disappointed.TREATED
— Kris V (@krisv_723) October 1, 2016
18. Catchy.
Is my costume here yet? Is my costume here yet? Is my costume here yet? Is my costume here yet? Is my costume here yet?
-My 8yo's theme song— Kim Bongiorno (@LetMeStart) October 5, 2015
19. Just be yourself.
I love Halloween.
Kids dress up like monsters.
It’s the one day they look like what they really are.
— James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn) October 25, 2016
20. And no one touch it.
Okay, it's time to separate all the Halloween candy from last night. Let's call this first pile, "Things Mommy Likes."
— Julie@NextLifeNOKids (@NextLifeNOKids) November 1, 2015
21. Mother knows best.
My mom has been to the store three times today to buy Halloween decorations, in case anyone was wondering where I get this from.
— pumpkin queen (@madddie818) October 16, 2016
22. Dads matter too, damnit.
It's like the Halloween industry doesn't even care if a dad wants a sexy costume.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) October 21, 2016
23. That’s a scary sight.
If this mirror is accurate, I'm going as my mother for Halloween this year.
— Madame Mumsie (@MUMSIEesq) October 24, 2016
24. Who’s idea was this, again?
The only truly scary thing about Halloween is keeping your kids up past bedtime on a school night and giving them extra sugar.
— Salty Mermaid (@Jenn_H_Scott) October 25, 2016