May 4, 2017

This Dedicated Teacher Finished Her Lesson Plan — While in Labor!

Being a teacher is an all-consuming job. It requires long hours, intense dedication, and so much patience. No one knows that better than teacher and mother of four Jennifer Pope.

Just last week, Pope was working studiously on lesson plans for her second-grade class. This would have been an average day in a teacher’s life, except that Pope was in labor at a Texas hospital while she was working!

Pope’s dear friend, photographer Andrea McDonald, captured and shared the candid moment on Facebook. Pope had no idea her friend had even taken the photo of her working until after she gave birth! In the post McDonald writes, “No, she is not doing her taxes. Those papers would be her lesson plans her husband is about to go drop off with her sub in the parking lot.”

With Teacher Appreciation Week fast approaching, McDonald saw Pope’s selfless moment as a loving reminder to everyone to appreciate the hardworking educators in their lives. She continues, “Spoil them rotten because even in labor, they care. No lie, she gave birth less than an hour later. This post is about showing the dedication of a teacher.”

As expected, the post has gone viral, with over 21K likes, 7K shares, and nearly 800 comments with educators, moms, and many others pouring out support for this phenomenal teacher.

One educator writes underneath the photo, “There’s nothing we won’t do for our kids, at home, and at school!” Another user comments, “Thank you to the educators on this thread. I am brought to tears knowing that you all care so much.” While a teacher who had a similar experience cheerfully shares, “Been there! I did my final grades between contractions. Way to go! You are amazing!”

image source: Andrea McDonald | Rooted in Love Photography

For Pope, the moment symbolized everything she already knows about teaching. She and her husband, fellow teacher Andrew Pope, have spent years embracing the emotional bond educators like her have with their students. That bond is one that often goes beyond the average work day and impacts nearly every aspect of a teacher’s life. 

“Teachers are never fully disconnected from their job. Even on maternity leave or in the summer, we have a responsibility to our students and their families,” she shares with Babble. “There is so much that goes on outside of the normal school day that teachers do to benefit their classroom and their students. But, also it’s not just a job to many of us. It’s a part of who we are.”

As a working mom, Pope knows all too well how challenging the juggle of her job and family can be. The recent birth of her daughter Clara has added one more adventure to her already jam-packed days. But she simply cannot imagine another way to live her life, telling Babble, “Being a working mom is hard, like really hard. But, it’s also very fulfilling and rewarding. I can’t imagine myself not teaching.”

image source: Andrea McDonald | Rooted in Love Photography

A teacher herself for six years, McDonald was all too happy to show her dear friend’s dedication to her students in the moment she photographed. And she’s even happier to see the positive impact that moment had on many others.

“I have loved the overwhelming positive response. So much of what a teacher does after hours goes unnoticed, McDonald tells Babble. “When I posted it, it was teacher after teacher sharing similar experiences of what they did for their students. It’s one of the hardest and most rewarding jobs.”

For devoted teachers, Pope is living proof that the job never ends. And for moms everywhere, she has reminded us that caring for our children is a superhuman effort. And that effort is worth every ounce of praise it receives.

Thanks to Jennifer Pope and all of the teachers in our lives for going above and beyond the call of duty to be there for our children!

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Facebook Group Bans Together, Donates 12 Gallons of Breast Milk to Mom with Cancer

When Sarah Murnane found out last week that her dear friend had been diagnosed with breast cancer, she wanted to do something — anything — to help her out. It wasn’t long before she had her answer.

Murnane, a photographer, mom of two, and breastfeeding advocate, is the founder of The Australian Breastfeeding Project, which showcases her gorgeous photographs of breastfeeding moms in an effort to “to erase the negative stigmas that surround breastfeeding,” according to her Facebook page.

Murnane tells Babble that one of the most heartbreaking aspects of her friend’s diagnosis was that she’d need to stop breastfeeding her 6-month-old son in order to begin treatments — and that’s when the two moms came up with a plan.

“A week-and-a-half ago, my friend was diagnosed with breast cancer,” Murnane tells Babble. “As soon as she found out, she knew that meant she would have to stop breastfeeding. She messaged me to ask if I could help find donor milk.”

Soon after, Murnane put out a call for breast milk donations to the local moms on her Facebook page.

“It is with tears in my eyes that I put a call out to help one of my close friends find donor milk for her little boy as she has been diagnosed with breast cancer,” the post began. “The project will be donating a deep freezer which I am hoping we can fill with donor milk. Her son has no intolerances but would prefer smoke, alcohol, and medication free.”

The response was so huge that Murnane had to set up a separate Facebook group just to manage the influx of donations. Within 24 hours, Murnane had received an astronomical amount of milk donations — enough to fill a deep freezer, which was also generously donated to the mom.

“Our sisterhood of milky mummas!!!” Murnane wrote in a follow-up Facebook post the next day. “I am so extremely proud of our ABP tribe; not even 24 hours and I have received this in donations for my beautiful friend. Thank you, this project is so much more than beautiful photos.”

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Murnane tells Babble that within four days of putting the call out, the moms had donated a whopping 45 liters of breast milk (that’s equivalent to almost 12 gallons!). And even more is on its way. Incredible, right? Murnane’s friend, whose name she has asked to withhold, is hoping to have a six-month supply of breast milk for her little guy. And if the momentum keeps going the way it has, it’s quite possible that she will.

As for how Murnane’s friend is doing now, Murnane shares with Babble that she is obviously having a tough time processing her diagnosis and mourning the loss of the breastfeeding relationship she envisioned with her baby, but that these milk donations are lifting her spirits.

Image Source: Sarah Murnane

“She has been so extremely grateful, [but] understandably devastated she can’t feed her youngest as she did with her older children,” Murnane shares with Babble. “She was relieved that she could give him the next best thing.”

While the journey ahead is definitely going to be difficult for Murnane’s friend, it sounds like she has a strong support system in place, and we hope she recovers quickly and as easily as possible.

Also, high-five to all those wonderful moms who went the extra mile for a mama in need — and did so with such speed, compassion, and generosity. You hear a lot about how much bullying and judgment goes on between moms online, but there is also a whole lot of good that can come of online communities like this one. And when it comes out to it, mothers are among the strongest, loving, most badass people in the world.

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This Disney Princess-Inspired Maternity Shoot Is the Stuff of Fairytales

I am, admittedly, pretty terrible at taking selfies; which is why during the final stretch of my last pregnancy, I had my husband take some sweet shots of my huge belly, so we could remember the miracle of what a woman’s body goes through in order to bring life into the world. But had I known that there’s a pair of photographers taking unbelievably amazing maternity photos of women dressed as Disney princesses … well, let’s just say I would have hauled my giant self to the Deep South to make sure I got in on this action.

Vic and Marie Luna, a married couple who run a photography business together in Houston, Texas, recently shared a series of breathtaking images they captured of five expecting mothers at Newman’s Castle — where they summoned some serious Disney magic and created gorgeous memories for each of the mothers.

Image Source: Vic and Marie Photography

“It was so much fun!” Marie tells Babble. “I literally felt like I was hanging with royalty when I saw them for the first time in the gowns and in hair and makeup! They looked incredibly amazing!”

The five women each wore form-fitting dresses in pastel colors inspired by famous Disney Princesses — from Belle to Jasmine to Snow White. These visual cues give the viewer a wonderful sense of storytelling, which is a huge part of the Lunas’ creative process.

Image Source: Vic and Marie Photography
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Image Source: Vic and Marie Photography

“We really hope that [everyone who sees] our images will make their own story, envision their own happily ever after for our mommies, and be inspired to think outside of the box and capture things that have never been done before,” the couple shares.

Of course, the true magic of these images isn’t in the dresses or the majestic castle in the background, but rather the beauty and excitement of pregnancy. People love maternity photos — and for good reason.

“We believe that it shows the beauty and essence of the bond between a mommy and their unborn child,” they tell Babble. “It’s a beautiful and fleeting moment that you only get one chance to capture, and once the little one is born, it’s gone. It’s a little heartbreaking for some of our mommies because they love the kicks and movements inside of them, and it’s so amazing to see them for their maternity session, and a month or two later we see them with a cute little baby in their arms at our studio getting their very first portraits with us.”

Image Source: Vic and Marie Photography
Image Source: Vic and Marie Photography
Image Source: Vic and Marie Photography

And while the Disney-inspired photo shoot is breathtaking all on its own, the Lunas seem to be well-versed in all kinds of out-of-the-box maternity shoot themes.

“In the past, we’ve done ‘Glamour Downtown’ group maternity shots, as well as a few other group maternity projects,” they share. “This one was probably the one that really brought us outside of our element because it was something that not many had taken a hold of as of yet. We can only hope that our next group project will be even more amazing than our last!”

We sure hope so, too.

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Sometimes I Fear I Wasn’t Meant to Be a Mother

Image Source: Thinkstock

“Sometimes I Fear I Wasn’t Meant to Be a Mother” originally appeared on Perfection Pending under the same title. It was reprinted here with permission.

Sometimes I fear I wasn’t meant to be a mother.

Just typing those words leaves me feeling empty and scared. I know I will be judged for them by the childless, the sanctimommies, and the empty nesters who say with a hand over their heart, “But it goes so fast!”

As I sit on my couch trying to think my own thoughts, three tired children who went to bed way too late last night creep up beside me. They peer over my shoulder at whatever it is I’m trying to work on, and muster the same tiresome words I’m sick of hearing: “I’m bored.”

I groan inside, feeling guilt that I should be the one entertaining them, while simultaneously feeling resentment that I can’t even focus without interruption long enough to write a sentence. I don’t want to play with the 4-year-old who begs me to play with him relentlessly, and I wonder if my personality was really meant for motherhood.

As a young girl, I always pictured myself as a mother. Doing better than my own mother did, of course. Ridiculously, I even pictured myself as a mother of eight children at one point in young adulthood. I felt confident that I would be patient, and never let them eat sugar, and love cooking, and always taking care of a house.

It’s all I wanted, really.

But, as I feel suffocated by the push and pull of motherhood, I wonder if I was really ever meant to do this. If maybe motherhood isn’t in my DNA, because I don’t love playing CandyLand with my 4-year-old, and my 10-year-old doesn’t talk to me when I want her to, and the weight of my 7-year-old’s anxiety issues is always in the back of my mind.

I recently went on a trip for the first time in 8 years; just my husband and I, without our kids. It was dreamy. A trip to NYC, a hotel with fancy white robes, and an ease of travel that just doesn’t come with three kids in tow. We ate good food, and slept in as late as we wanted, and meandered down the streets of the Upper West Side carrying fresh flowers and walking hand in hand. I felt more easy going and relaxed. More like myself.

And, days after we were home, as I felt the tension in my neck start to build and a relentless dull headache that I can’t seem to shake day after day, I feared again that maybe I wasn’t meant to be a mother. After all, I was so much better on that trip with my husband when I wasn’t mothering.

I started to look back at that trip like a dream, unable to recognize the woman that let her husband call the shots, and didn’t stress about hiccups in the trip because she knew she was being taken care of. The one who wasn’t in charge of anything, or anyone. It didn’t seem real how I sat on a park bench in the sun, with my headphones in. My husband snapped a photo of me because I “looked like a New Yorker” in that moment; happy and at ease in a giant city of chaos.

The weight of my responsibility is weighing me down, making me question if I was ever in fact, meant to do this at all.
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I feel sad when I reject my children’s advances for attention when I have something I’d rather be doing, and tell myself that other mothers probably want to play with their kids, so why don’t I? Obviously it’s because I wasn’t meant to be a mother.

The weight of my responsibility is weighing me down, making me question if I was ever in fact, meant to do this at all. Someone else would definitely do it better, and someone else that loves to play candy land would be a better mother to my kids.

After all, I felt more like myself when I wasn’t mothering. So, what else could that mean, except that maybe I wasn’t meant to be a mother to these three fantastic human beings?

Except.

Except, I don’t believe I am supposed to be the person I was before becoming a mother. That’s the thing. I think mothering my three fantastic small humans is supposed to transform me into something better. And transformations aren’t supposed to be easy.

The guilt I feel is self-imposed and unnecessary. One of the countless lessons I’ve learned from motherhood is that I need to try to give myself the gift of true, beautiful acceptance of who I am.

Why were these precious children given to imperfect, broken me? Who the hell knows.
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Mothering is hard for me. I struggle. I make mistakes. I don’t love playing make-believe with my kids. But, I also do a lot of things right. And, accepting that this mother — me; my broken, imperfect, high-anxiety self — is meant to mother the three beautiful souls I’ve been given … well, that’s part of the reason why I’m meant for motherhood.

Why were these precious children given to imperfect, broken me? Who the hell knows.

But, I guarantee that I’m learning as much raising them as they are learning being raised by a woman in a constant transformative state of being. In fact, I know I am.

If I were to make a list of the lessons I’ve learned, and the ways I’ve changed, it would be long — and breathtaking I’m sure. But, I’m too tired to make lists, and I’m too overwhelmed to remember how far I’ve come. So I’ll keep fighting those feelings of inadequacy day by day, hour by hour as they rush in during a moment when I feel selfish and don’t want to play a game.

The weight I add to this whole motherhood thing is probably too great if I am being truly honest. Sure, mothers have an important job, but deep down, I realize that much of who my children will become has nothing to do with me. And, when I think about it, they will spend many more years away from my care than in it. It’s heartbreaking to think about. In fact, I can’t think about them leaving me without feeling like a piece of me will die when that happens.

Which just proves me wrong yet again.

If I feel that way, then I am meant to be a mother. So I can become who I’m supposed to be. Transformed into a woman far more beautiful than who I was before.

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At This UK Hospital, Parents Care for Their Preemies Themselves — and the Babies Are Thriving

Image Source: Thinkstock

One of the most difficult aspects of having a premature baby in the NICU is how helpless and disconnected parents can end up feeling. It can be traumatizing to see your baby hooked up to all kinds of machines, and for others to be in charge of their round-the-click care. Of course you want your baby to receive all the life-saving medical attention they need, but you also want nothing more than to scoop them up in your arms and simply go home.

But that’s precisely what one hospital in the UK is trying to change, with a new program that allows __parents to become a whole lot more involved in caring for their preemies. According to the BBC, St James’s University Hospital in Leeds is the first hospital in the UK to implement what’s being called a “family integrated care system.”

The innovative program puts __parents in charge of caring for their preemies — at least when it comes to the majority of their care — instead of nurses and other medical staff. If all of that sounds sort of worrisome to you, here’s why it shouldn’t: parents receive a thorough training, and are watched over carefully until they get it right. A few weeks in, they become pros at it all, and are expected to do most of the everyday care for their preemies, including temperature taking, feeding, and even inserting nasogastric feeding tubes.

Dr. Liz McKechnie, a neonatologist at St. James’s Hospital, recently told the BBC that the program’s ultimate goal is to put the parents at “the very center of the team caring for the baby.”

McKechnie assures that the program was not put in place to cut costs, and that nurses have not been fired as a result. In fact, the nurses in the ward probably spend more time training the parents than they would simply caring for the babies themselves. And so far, it’s certainly paid off.

The hospital says the results have been pretty incredible so far, with breastfeeding rates increasing, babies making strides in their long-term development, and many going home much sooner than expected. And the parents of these sweet babies are seeing (and feeling) wonderful results, as well.

“It is just nice to feel like a mum, rather than just somebody watching,” Anna Cox recently shared in an interview on the Victoria Derbyshire Show.

Cox’s daughter Lola was born at just 23 weeks. Sadly, Lola had a twin brother who didn’t make it. Cox was told that her daughter would have a very tough road ahead of her, and might not make it herself.

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“During labor, one of the neo-natal consultants came to see us and painted a really bad picture that she could have all sorts of problems,” Anna shared.

But thanks to the gentle and highly-attentive care Cox was able to give her daughter at St James’s, Lola got to go home much earlier than expected, just 14 weeks after she was born.

“Without the family integrated care we would’ve been in a lot longer,” says Cox, “Lola is still on oxygen and [otherwise] they wouldn’t have allowed us to come home with that. I feel really confident in everything they taught us.”

Although the program is new to St. James’s Hospital, it’s not an entirely novel idea. In the 1970s, a hospital in the Soviet Union actually stumbled upon the idea of “family integrated care” by accident. According to the BBC, the Soviet Union was facing all sorts of budget cuts, and began to give parents a greater role in the NICU out of necessity.

But they soon found that babies were thriving as a result. Just as the parents at St. James’s Hospital have seen, Russian parents reported higher rates of “skin-to-skin” time with their babies, increased breastfeeding rates, and their babies went home sooner.

As the BBC points out, St. James’s isn’t the only hospital that has tried this program out. Hospitals in Canada, Australia, and New Zealand have adopted versions of the program as well, with promising results.

To some, a program like this might sound dangerous, or possibly too time consuming for parents, especially if they have other responsibilities like full-time jobs and other children. But the program at St. James’s is so successful that it looks like it’s here to stay.

“Nobody wants to stop it, it is definitely here to stay, everybody can see the benefits of it,” shared Dr. McKechnie. “The fact is that families are going home more confident and more able to care for their babies, and that means a lot.”

Here’s hoping similar programs open up across the U.S. soon enough!

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Chris Pratt on the ‘Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2’ Scene That Made Every Parent Tear Up

Editor’s Note: Babble and Marvel Entertainment are a part of The Walt Disney Company.

guardians of the galaxy
Image source: The Walt Disney Company

There’s a scene in Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2 where Peter Quill (aka Star-Lord) is sitting in his starship listening to some tunes on his “new” Zune. Baby Groot climbs up on Peter’s lap and asks for the headphones to listen along with him. In that moment, a quiet yet powerful transformation takes place for Peter as he realizes the gravity of what it means to be a parent.

At the press conference for Guardians, Chris Pratt (Peter Quill) shares what was going through his character’s mind during that scene:

“I’m thinking about the relationship I had with the man who raised me (Yondu, played by Michael Rooker), and it’s in that moment I realize that I’ve now entered the chapter in my life where I’m going to be the man who’s raising somebody,” he notes.

It’s safe to say Pratt could easily be connecting Quill’s sentiments to his own experience with his sweet son, Jack. He continued:

“And you know, I’m going to have to make some choices on how I’m going to be, what I’m going to take with me, because that’s how I was raised and also what I won’t do because that’s how I was raised. And I think that’s sort of the journey that every parent will take when they have a kid, and I think Quill kind of gets to that.”

Hearing Pratt say those words, I couldn’t help but think of my own similar moment of realization. My wife Cassie and I had been preparing for the birth of our baby girl Emma for nearly nine months. Even before that, we had talked about having a child of our own. When I married my wife, I also became a stepparent to her daughter, Eve. I cherished her, but I wasn’t prepared for the shift that happened the moment I first held Emma’s hand.

She had been born mere minutes before and was sitting in a warming station as they were cleaning her off. I placed my pinkie finger inside of her tiny hand and she immediately grabbed hold of it. It was then, I knew: it was my time to make those decisions for my life and for hers. It wasn’t that I hadn’t given my all to Eve, but like for Peter in the film, I realized that, like my father was to me, I was now the father to this child. As parents, we all experience this revelation whether your child is yours through biology, adoption, or marriage.

Which is not to say I haven’t made my share of mistakes (sorry, girls), because I have. Each of your children is different and sometimes need you to be a different dad to them. Eve is lucky to have her biological dad active in her life so for her, I have more of a supporting role. But for Emma, I’ve been her primary caregiver since birth. Having had the privilege of being a stay-at-home dad for nearly the first two years of her life, my role is different.

But who I am and what I bring to the table is all up to me.

As a father, you can only prepare so much. You can read books, go to parenting classes, and attend support groups, but eventually the training wheels come off and you’ve just got to step up and do it. You’ll fall down at times (again, sorry girls) and you’ll make mistakes. But if you get up and learn from the past, carrying with you what helped you succeed while leaving behind what held you back, you’ll be a better parent for it … at least I hope so.

You’ll have to ask my own Baby Groot someday.

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Here’s Why You Should Never Judge a Parent Whose Kid Is Glued to Their Tablet

eden strong son on tablet
Image Source: Eden Strong

“I’m amazed at how much time kids spend on their tablets these days,” the waitress said, without even attempting to hide her disdain. And then — after slipping a children’s menu in between my 5-year-old son’s face and the tablet he was intensely focused on — she turned her eyes towards me, smirked, and added sarcastically, “I’m guessing he doesn’t want any crayons?”

Listen lady, don’t judge me, I thought to myself. But the truth is, I’ve had that thought way too many times on this topic.

I’ll admit it; I’m that mom. The one who takes her children to the park, and doesn’t mind if her kid sits on the bench and plays on his tablet the entire time. The mom who brings it along on family outings, or social functions, and never forgets the charger. In fact, a few months ago, I took my 5-year-old son to an amusement park, handed him a tablet, and my husband pushed him around in a stroller all day so that he could focus on his games without walking into anything (or anyone). You can’t even imagine the dirty looks that people gave us.

But what people didn’t know, was that the stroller-and-tablet combo was providing a much-needed break for my son. A break he often needs when his brain is overwhelmed by the effects of his epilepsy.

There are moments when he needs to be able to tune out the world, and focus on one thing. When he’s been up all night seizing and is exhausted, dazed, and grouchy as hell. Or when his tiny little brain is gearing up to seize again, and he isn’t in a position to be interacting with other people, or process the environment around him.

There are times when he just needs everyone and everything to leave him alone.

Sometimes, he just needs his tablet, and when that happens, what he doesn’t need, is to be judged. And I don’t need to be judged, either.

I was never planning to be a ‘screen time’ mom … But then my kids were born, and reality set in.
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Seriously, when did other people become an expert in parenting my children, or any other children than their own?

For the record, I was never planning to be a “screen time” mom. Before I had kids, I had visions of homeschooling my little people, and only letting them watch an hour of TV on the weekends. I figured that I was going to be a Pinterest mom, and we were going to be an outdoorsy family; always on the move with another adventure in sight. I was certainly never intending to take a tablet along on a nature hike.

But then my kids were born, and reality set in. What they needed was not what I had expected, and so, I adapted.

Then, when epilepsy came along, I adapted again. I changed my idea of how I had planned to raise my son — and what I assumed and expected he would need — and instead, I gave him what he actually needed. Because I am his mother, and that is my job.

And yes, it was a struggle to accept.

It’s not easy raising kids with special needs, especially when I have another child with a genetic disorder, and have spent most of the time as a single parent (which I was also not expecting to do). But harder yet, is not feeling supported by my fellow mothers.

I see your glares, the ones you give me in shock and awe when we visit the library, tablet in hand. I know you are judging me when you throw in your little comments of “my-my, he sure is into that, isn’t he?”

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Yes, he is, because it’s what he needs right now. He needs a break from life, and I need a break from the judgement.

Some days I aim for the moon, and settle for a tablet in the middle of a children’s museum instead.
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Epilepsy aside, sometimes we all just need a break — whether it’s children with special needs, or their overwhelmed __parents who cannot fathom being “on duty” for one more minute; couples desperate to reconnect over adult conversation, or children that have missed naps and are grouchy beyond being reasoned with.

If a tablet can calm temporarily calm a difficult situation, then I say more power to you! I won’t judge you for a minute, or assume that just because I see your kid on a tablet, that it’s the only thing they ever do.

My life cannot always stop just because my son needs a break. Epilepsy is unpredictable and I would be chained to the house if I halted my life because of it. That is not a luxury I have with another child to attend to, and things that I need to get done. It’s not even what I want for my son. But this is his life, and I want to immerse him in all its experiences, as much as I can; even if that means that some days, it’s only absorbed in glimpses when he looks up from a screen.

I don’t pretend to have all the answers, and right now, this is the best solution that I can come up with. It’s not perfect, but it works for us, and if there’s anything that I’ve learned over the course of my parenting career, it’s that sometimes, you just throw out the plans you had, and do what works best for your kids.

Some days I aim for the moon, and settle for a tablet in the middle of a children’s museum instead. And if I see you there, doing the same thing, I won’t judge you for it.

I trust you, because you know your kids better than I do.

This Mother-Daughter Duo Wore the Same Prom Dress 22 Years Apart — and Both Killed It

Shockingly, not all ’90s fashion is lost.

When 18-year-old Ally Johnson of Hilliard, Ohio laid eyes on her mother’s vintage, old-Hollywood style prom dress from 1995, she knew she had to wear it to her own upcoming prom. “I shocked myself by how much I loved it,” she tells Babble.

Ally’s spring prom pics were an eerie replica of her mom’s from 22 years earlier — and just as gorgeous. Not to mention, when she tweeted out the photos, they immediately went viral with 3K likes and 375 retweets.

First, check out Ally’s beautiful look from this year:

Image Source: Ally Johnson | Twitter

And then compare it to her mother’s picture. Eerily similar.

girl in prom dress
Image Source: Ally Johnson | Twitter

Ally originally ordered another dress online, but didn’t like it once she tried it on at her grandmother’s house. “Afterwards, I asked to try on my mom’s prom dress, because I knew my grandma had been holding onto it all this time,” says Ally.

Luckily, the dress fit exactly without any alternations, like it had been waiting all these years for this moment.

Looking at the pics side by side, this mother and daughter duo look just like twins — both with handsome dates to boot. And according to Ally, she and her mother are indeed very much alike.

“I’m like a brunette version of my mother,” says Ally. “I would consider her one of my best friends. We talk the same, and like all the same things.”

Yet, even though they’re close, wearing your mom’s dress from the ’90s to prom is a whole other thing. Thankfully, the simple style of the gown made it an easier choice.

“If there had been shoulder pads, I would have [had] to call it quits,” she jokes.

h/t: Today

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Dad Overseas Sends ‘Beauty and the Beast’ Character to Daughter’s Dance in His Absence

“Dad Overseas Sends ‘Beauty and the Beast’ Character to Daughter’s Dance in His Absence” originally appeared on ABC News and was reprinted with permission.

beauty and the beast
image source: Courtesy Lanya Nelson

Little Gracee Nelson, 5, was truly the “Belle” of the ball at her father-daughter dance, despite at first being heartbroken that her dad wouldn’t be able to attend.

Her dad, Christopher Nelson, has been in Afghanistan since early March working as a contractor for the Army.

“We found out about the dance the very beginning of April,” Gracee’s mom, Lanya Nelson, of El Paso, Texas, told ABC News. “We live about 10 hours away from all family members, and I told her daddy wasn’t going to be able to come. He wouldn’t be home in time. This was her first time being away from my husband for such a long period of time. She was so devastated. She bawled her eyes out. She’s such a daddy’s girl.”

After exhausting all efforts trying to get one of her grandfathers or uncles to attend the dance to no avail, the Nelsons brainstormed with each other on Facebook to come up with a plan fit for a princess.

“I was so close to getting a $400 plane ticket for her uncle. I didn’t want to break her heart,” Lanya nelson recalled. “It was one of those moments you knew she was going to remember. I wanted it to be happy memory, not a sad memory. The theme of the dance was ‘Beauty and the Beast.’ And I’m like, ‘What if I contact the school and ask them if we can hire a character to take her?’ They thought it was such a wonderful idea.”

In her dad’s absence, the creative __parents sent the Beast character to escort Gracee in style, hiring the character from event company Magical Moments. The two danced the night away to the film’s iconic song, “Beauty and the Beast.”

beauty and the beast gracee
image source: Courtesy Lanya Nelson

“The Beast blew us away. He twirled her, he dipped her. He lifted her and was dancing with her,” said Lanya Nelson. “He was dancing with all the kids. All the kids got a chance to dance with him and take pictures. She was literally the Belle of the ball. She was just beside herself — The fact that the Beast took her.”

Next time though, “Let’s have daddy go,” Gracee told her mom.

beauty and the beast gracee
image source: Courtesy Lanya Nelson

It was a bittersweet moment for the family.

“It was heartbreaking for my husband too because this was his first dance he was going to miss of hers,” said Lanya Nelson. “And it was the big one -– the daddy-daughter dance. He was really sad about it too. But when we were at the dance we FaceTimed him to make it feel special and so he could see her in her dress.”

To see the big smile on Gracee’s face was “the best feeling in the world,” the proud mom added. “It was the feeling of, ‘We did it right.’ It felt good to know that we made her night together.”

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A Father Should Never Be Shamed for Taking Paternity Leave

blair johnson paternity leave
Image source: Blair Johnson

It’s a topic that stirs debate on a seemingly daily basis: paternity leave in the sports world.

The latest example took place when Boston sports talk radio host, Michael Felger, called out his coworker, Michael Hurley, for taking advantage of the company-sponsored two-week benefit.

For context purposes, Felger has been critical of professional athletes sitting out games to be with their families around the time their children were born. His primary argument is that professionals get paid excessive amounts of money to play specific, scheduled games during the calendar year. Barring any health concerns for mother or child, the players should be available — save for missing a day or two for the actual birth — to play games. Never mind that timing conception is an inexact science at best. And try as we may to plan when our babies are born, babies arrive when they’re ready.

After Felger ranted against Hurley for being on paid leave to be with his family, the new father called in to defend himself and it got ugly in a hurry.

Here’s a brief transcript:

“Felger, what the hell is wrong with you?” Hurley asked. “What went wrong in your life? Then Hurley added, “This is what life is like for people who don’t summer in Nantucket. We have to figure it out. I’m thankful I work for a company that gives me time to take care of my family.

That set Felger off.

“Why do you think I get to summer in Nantucket?!” Felger told Hurley. “Because I work my a** off, Hurley! Because I work my a** off! And when my wife had a baby, I went into work two days later because my work’s important to me.” Felger continued: “You want a tissue?” Felger said. “Why do you think I summer in Nantucket? You think that was handed to me? Ya a**hat!”

Yikes. Name-calling and nonsense aside, here’s why Felger’s Neanderthal take is flat-out wrong: paternity leave isn’t about men taking advantage of a system that allows them to take paid time off. It’s about new fathers being there during one of the most critical times in their family’s life.

It doesn’t matter whether you play sports professionally, cover sports professionally, or are simply an average Joe. Paternity leave is something every man should be entitled to. And as someone who’s been a member of sports media my entire career and has experienced both sides of the paid leave benefit, I can say it makes a huge difference.

blair johnson paternity leave
Image source: Blair Johnson

When my son was born in October 2013, my employer at the time offered eight weeks paid paternity leave that could be taken any time over the course of our child’s first year. I was beyond thankful for this opportunity. Of course, I take great pride in my work ethic, but this was our first child! I wasn’t going to miss valuable time away from my wife and kid to cover the World Series or football season. Believe it or not, there are more important things in life.

blair johnson paternity leave
Image source: Blair Johnson

I ended up taking time off over the course of the following milestone periods of our boy’s first year:

  • First two weeks: Routines are developed, diapers are changed, errands are run for recovering mommies, and essential bonding time is enjoyed between father and child.
  • 4½-month mark: After spending nearly the entire month of February in Russia covering the Sochi Olympics, it was vital to spend quality time with my young family for another two weeks. (Plus, it didn’t hurt to be around for the first attempts at sleep training.)
  • 9-month mark: Sleep training is in full swing, crawling is happening, and words are starting to form.
  • 1-year mark: You only celebrate your first birthday once! And entertaining out-of-town family for the big event can be exhausting.

Needless to say, I felt so connected to my son and wife because of these memorable times together.

blair johnson paternity leave
Image source: Blair Johnson

Now, contrast these experiences with the birth of our daughter in August 2016. Having started a new job exactly one week after her birth, it not only would have been wholly inappropriate for me to take paternity leave the way I did the first time around, but as a freelancer it wasn’t even offered.

Remember those errands I ran for my recovering wife in the first couple weeks the first time around? Yeah, that stopped after six days. And who brought our soon-to-be 3-year-old to day care after a week? Yep, you guessed it — my saint of a wife (who delivered naturally and was not nearly fully recovered).

As a result, I didn’t feel nearly the same initial bond with my daughter that I did with my son. Thanks to more time together these days with my baby girl, that has changed. Nevertheless, it’s different without the benefit of paternity leave.

Getting back to the sports debate, if you want to subscribe to the antiquated notion of “the menfolk” getting back to work as soon as possible after babies are born while the women stay home to care for them, do so at your own risk. As far as I’m concerned, that mindset perpetuates outdated family dynamics of clueless dads and stay-at-home moms.

This just in: the vast majority of women work these days. Paternity leave simply allows fathers an opportunity to be away from their jobs for a short period. And after all, isn’t family supposed to come first?

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What Am I Doing to My Kid When I Yell?

“What Am I Doing to My Kid When I Yell?” originally appeared on Fatherly and was reprinted with permission.

yell at kids
Image source: Thinkstock

With the exception of umpires, NASCAR pit crews, and political radio jocks, being a parent is one of the few occupations where yelling feels mandatory. The question isn’t why __parents yell — there are myriad reasons —  but what effect it’s having on children. And the growing scientific consensus is that yelling or scolding makes them more aggressive, more anxious.

According to Dr. Laura Markham, founder of Aha! Parenting and author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting, shouting is something we can do without. But she’s also a realist. You get three hours of sleep a night, you’re going to lose your shit. The good news is that for those who sporadically go to 11, the psychological and emotional damage to a kid is minimal (assuming it’s not true verbal abuse). The bad news is those who are doing it constantly are setting up more shouting matches in the late-elementary school and teenage years. Here’s what’s actually happening when __parents raise their voice.

Fight, Flight, or Freeze

Dr. Markham says that while parents who shout aren’t ruining their kids’ brains, per se, they are changing them. “Let’s say during a soothing experience [the brain’s] neurotransmitters respond by sending out soothing biochemicals that we’re safe. That’s when a child is building neural pathways to calm down.”

When a toddler with an underdeveloped prefrontal cortex and not much in the way of executive function gets screamed at, the opposite happens. “The kid releases biochemicals that say fight, flight, or freeze. They may hit you. They may run away. Or they freeze and look like a deer in headlights. None of those are good for brain formation,” she says. If that action happens repeatedly, the behavior becomes ingrained.

Shouting Is Never Communicating

It doesn’t matter if someone is in a boardroom or the playroom, the minute that person raises their voice, their words lose credibility. Nobody (except for a small percentage of sadists) enjoy being yelled at. So, why would kids? “When parents yell, kids acquiesce on the outside, but the child isn’t more open to your influence, they’re less,” says Dr. Markham. Younger kids may bawl; older kids will get a glazed-over look — but both are shutting down instead of listening.

Grown-Ups Are Scary

The power parents hold over young kids is absolute. To them, their folks are humans twice their size who provide things they need to live: Food, shelter, love — Nick Jr. When that person they trust implicitly frightens them, it rocks their sense of security. And yes, it’s truly frightening for a child. “They’ve done studies where people were filmed yelling. When it was played back to the subjects, they couldn’t believe how twisted their faces got,”  says Dr. Markham. A 3-year-old may appear to push buttons and give off an attitude like an adult, but they still don’t have the emotional maturity to be treated like one.

Parents Who Yell Train Kids Who Tell

“Normalize” is a word that gets thrown about a lot these days in politics, but it’s also applicable to a child’s environment. parents who constantly yell in the house make that behavior normal for a kid, and they’ll adapt to it. Dr. Markham notes that if a child doesn’t bat an eye when they’re being scolded, there’s too much scolding going on. Instead, parents need to first and foremost  be models of self-regulation. In essence, to really get a kid to behave, grown-ups have to first.

It’s Not About “Letting Them Off, Easy”

How else will a kid know dad is super pissed unless there’s yelling? That parent may feel like they’re putting their foot down and establishing some discipline; what they’re really doing is exacerbating the problem. Because while scaring a kid straight in the moment may get them to knock off what they’re doing, it’s eroding trust in the relationship. Better to not say anything than risk getting their hair blown back.

There is an alternative method that’s more effective and not as hardline: humor. “If the parent responds with a sense of humor, you still maintain your authority and keep them connected to you,” says Dr. Markham. Laughter seems like a more welcomed outcome than cowering.

When It’s Ok To Yell

While the majority of the time yelling isn’t prescriptive, “there are times it’s great to raise your voice,” says Dr. Markham. “When you have kids hitting each other, like siblings, or there’s real danger.“ These are instances when shocking them works, but she points out that once you get a kid’s attention, modulate your voice. Basically, yell to warn, but speak to explain.

Nobody is going to stifle themselves around their kids all the time, and nor should that. That’s not what it’s like to be a person. But if yelling is your default, it’s time to understand that it’s a harmful long-term parenting strategy.

More from Fatherly:

  • 5 Myths About Child Discipline
  • 6 Mistakes Parents Make Talking To Their Kids And How To Fix Them
  • How My Mom Used Ice Cream Instead Of Punishment To Teach A Valuable Lesson
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These Moms Took Their Strollers to Washington to Demand Affordable Childcare

Image Source: Zero to Three

On Tuesday May 2, over 250 families strolled down Independence Avenue in Washington, D.C. And by “strolled”, I mean literally — moms and dads took to the streets on foot, pushing their babies and kids in strollers. They hailed from near and far (in fact, there was at least one representative from all 50 states), and were there for one important reason: to participate in “Strolling Thunder,” an event that will hopefully lead to legislative improvements in both family leave and infant care.

Organized by the nonprofit Zero to Three, the event also included over 150 one-on-one meetings between American families and members of Congress.

Elizabeth Wahl, a mother of two from Wisconsin who attended the event, tells Babble that the experience of being on Capitol Hill with her 11-month old was thrilling. As a social worker and staff member with the Wisconsin Alliance for Infant Mental Health, Wahl knows first-hand just how critical the first three years of a child’s life are in preparing for a healthy and successful future. She also says that every legislator she met with was interested, engaged, and had plenty of questions about how they could help support the mission of Zero to Three and Strolling Thunder.

Matthew Melmed, who has served as Executive Director of Zero to Three for the past 23 years, tells Babble that he believes babies deserve to have their voices heard — and that’s precisely what this movement is all about. As the organization’s name implies, Zero to Three believes in the importance of babies having a strong start in life, especially from birth to age three. Only when they receive proper healthcare, nutrition, nurturing, and love, can babies truly thrive. As the nonprofit’s website states: “At Zero to Three, we envision a society that has the knowledge and will to support all infants and toddlers in reaching their full potential.”

And those needs are met with affordable, quality childcare, accessible health insurance, and better family leave.

“There is nothing more important to us than our babies,” Wahl told legislators on Capitol Hill yesterday. “Parents should not have to sacrifice quality for affordability when choosing childcare.”

Despite being one of the most developed nations in the world, a large percentage of American mothers still receive little to no maternity leave. Coupled with the skyrocketing costs of childcare in this country, __parents are oftentimes forced to make difficult childcare decisions that compromise what’s best for their families.

As Wahl tells Babble, she and her husband are prime examples of that — they are no longer homeowners, and have switched to renting in order to afford childcare. But Zero to Three and Strolling Thunder are hoping to help families just like her’s, so that raising a family becomes less of a financial burden, and kids have a more secure path to success.

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Melmed adds that he’s very optimistic the U.S. will see improvements in the ways we care for babies soon, as there’s a greater increase in parental interest than ever before.

“Parents know what it means when they can’t be home to bond with their baby,” Melmed tells Babble. “We know now what science tells us about how a parent-child connection impacts brain development. There’s an awareness that wasn’t there 10 years ago.”

And Melmed hopes that this new awareness and the impact of events just like Strolling Thunder will prompt changes at the Congressional level. Specifically, Zero to Three is asking Congress to: Create a national paid family leave program, extend early Head Start to eligible infants and toddlers in poverty, ensure all families can afford quality childcare, and work to improve mental health programs that begin in infancy.

Research shows that babies who receive proper care and time to bond with their __parents are more likely to succeed academically and in the workforce, are more likely to have good mental health, are less likely to face a life of crime, and are less likely to have health issues like high blood pressure as adults. Hopefully with passionate voices like Matthew Melmed’s and Elizabeth Wahl’s, Congress will also hear the voices of our nation’s youngest citizens.

Our babies are our future. They deserve proper care and frankly, if we don’t take care of them, we will all suffer the consequences.

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Mom Peels Out of Carpool Lane and Leaves Her Kids Behind to Teach Them a Valuable Lesson

carpool mom
Image source: Thinkstock

Parents are no strangers to waiting. We wait for (and on) our children all the time. In fact, ask a child to “hurry up” and you will most definitely find yourself waiting even longer than you’d ever expect to wait on anything.

Recently, a mother of three named Maureen shared a story on this exact predicament — but with an interesting twist. It all happened one day while she was sitting in her car (one of the most glorious of all waiting places), waiting to pick her two sons up from practice. That’s when she decided she’d had enough. “Enough of waiting for her precious kids?” you may be asking yourself. “How could any parent not be waiting in excitement to be reunited with their child after leaving them for any period of time?”

Ha! Oh wait, sorry. Haaaaaaaa!

But it wasn’t that Maureen had gotten sick of waiting, it was the fact that both of her sons didn’t seem to understand the concept that she may have something better to do than simply wait for them all day.

As she recently wrote in a post on TODAY:

“I had been sitting in a hot August afternoon carpool for 27 minutes, watching — watching the post-practice huddle, watching other waiting moms, watching those other waiting moms’ kids trickling down the sidewalk to waiting cars, watching the clock, watching for my two sons to emerge from the locker room — so that I could GO.”

As Maureen goes on to explain, she was in a full-on panic because she still needed to pick up her other son. And that’s when this happened: “Finally, I saw my boys,” Maureen writes. ” … walking … slowly to the car … stopping to talk with a friend … and … I put my car into drive and pulled away.”

That’s right; she decided to teach her boys a valuable lesson in life — they aren’t the center of the universe; and Mom doesn’t have all day.

“Yep, I left my middle school sons at carpool, and it was the most intoxicating, liberating thing I had done since they were born,” Maureen continues. “For the record, I wasn’t abandoning them in a back alley somewhere. They were at the school field, it was broad daylight, and there were tons of people around.”

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Any parent whose child is of a certain age has totally been in this mom’s shoes — more than a few times. You wait. And you wait. Then you wait some more.

Now, I am a little bit of a worrier myself, so sometimes when the wait gets to be too long, a certain amount of worry inevitably creeps in. What if they got hurt during practice? What if they got done early and someone kidnapped them while they were waiting outside? Fine, I am a lot of a worrier. Then, I see my little angel slowly walk out like he’s got all the time in the world, and all my worry turns to hot, seething mom rage.

“By my estimation, I had already spent years of my life sitting in carpool lines,” Maureen writes. “Years of my intelligent, college-educated life spent waiting for and watching other people doing things.”

In leaving, she hoped to teach her boys a few valuable life lessons. One of which was this: They should hustle.

“You should hustle for everyone — not just for the burly guys with the whistles,” she explains. “Don’t just hustle in front of the guy who decides if you play or not. Hustle because that is the kind of person you are all the time, and you will be successful in life.”

She also taught them to figure things out for themselves, something all kids need to learn early and often.

“They figured it out,” she explains. “They rallied, found an older kid who played a different sport but lived in our neighborhood, asked him for a ride home, and walked in the door, chastened but triumphant.”

But most importantly, in peeling out of the parking lot that day, she taught her sons a lesson all kids need to understand — that their __parents have a life.

“It also reminds me that as much as I love them and love being their mom, I can’t let that be my whole life,” Maureen concludes.

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Her story is a stellar reminder of just how important it is to lead by example. As she explains in her post, the moment actually happened years ago, but recently, as she sat with her two sons waiting on another kid, she watched as her son yelled out: “Dude, HUSTLE. Move it, my mom’s got stuff to do.”

Now that’s what I call a parenting WIN.

h/t: Today.com

Military Dad Poses as Catcher at Baseball Game for Emotional Surprise for Kids

“Military Dad Poses as Catcher at Baseball Game for Emotional Surprise for Kids” originally appeared on ABC News and was reprinted with permission.

A U.S. Air Force service member home from a six-month deployment overseas surprised his two children by pretending to be a catcher at a minor league baseball game.

Tech. Sgt, Lance Daigle donned a catcher’s uniform and got in position to catch the ceremonial opening pitch at a Carolina Mudcats game last week in Zebulon, North Carolina.

daigle pitcher surprise
image source: Carolina Mudcats

On the other side of the pitcher’s mound were two of Daigle’s two children, Cameron, 11, and Karley, 13. The siblings walked onto the mound believing they won the right to pitch through a VIP experience raffle.

Daigle, who is known in the family for filling out online surveys and entering competitions, got a text message from Karley about winning the raffle while he was in Kuwait.

“I was getting ready to go to bed and she texted me to call her and said, ‘We got this thing but I don’t think it’s real,’” Daigle said of Karley, who opened a notification about the winning prize on April Fool’s Day. “I said, ‘Yeah, I filled that out.’”

In reality, Daigle had emailed the Carolina Mudcats, a team located about an honor from the Daigle family’s home, about surprising his kids after getting the idea from his wife, Emily.

“This could be my last deployment before I retire so she and one of her friends started to think about a surprise,” said Daigle, a 19-year Air Force veteran. “They thought of the Mudcats because we’ve been to games and they’re big supporters of the military.”

The Mudcats then took over organizing the surprise, including mailing the VIP experience “winning tickets” and getting a uniform for Daigle to wear.

“And then we just hoped for the best from there because with the military sometimes things happen,” Daigle said. “But I made it back on the day I needed to.”

The surprise reunion was so emotional that inside the stadium it was “hard to see a dry eye,” according to a Mudcats spokeswoman.

“Both teams were paying attention and that’s not something that normally happens,” said Becca Holtgreive, the team’s director of community relations. “It was special.”

Daigle’s children are enjoying the attention their surprise received, and the extra time with their dad back home.

Daigle said he is home for the near future, with no future deployments planned.

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Ed Sheeran Holds Private Show for a Little Girl Too Sick to See Him in Concert

Last November, Ed Sheeran made the Internet’s heart melt when he made the dreams of a 9-year-old fan come true. And now, he’s making them melt all over again, with one more tribute to her.

To catch you up, Melody Driscoll was born with Rhett syndrome, a condition that “causes problems in brain function that are responsible for cognitive, sensory, emotional, motor, and autonomic function.” As a result, Melody has sadly spent 80 percent of her life in a hospital.

But her favorite person in the world — the one who can make any dark day brighter — is Ed Sheeran. Every time she hears one his songs, it helps Melody regain the strength she needs to fight for her life. So when Ed caught wind of melody’s story and showed up in person to serenade her last fall, it was pure magic.

But apparently, that wouldn’t be the end of their story — it seems Melody got her second date with Ed on May 2; and it was almost as touching as the first.

In a post on the Facebook page Melody In Mind, Melody’s mom shared the following message with her followers:

“Yesterday Melody got her 2nd Date with Ed Sheeran. Due to Melody’s health she will never be able to attend a proper concert. So, Ed created a mini concert just for her and him so she got to experience the amazing sound and amazing atmosphere of seeing Ed live on stage, complete with all staging and lighting effects including all the big screens. He let her pick what songs she wanted him to sing to her and spent one on one time together gazing in each other’s eyes. It was the most amazing thing to watch. The love they have for each other is obvious for anyone to see. He even drew him and Melody on her cast, using a gold pen for their hair lol. And wrote ‘Love You’ on Melody’s wheelchair. To top the afternoon off, Stuart and Mark surprised Melody and us, by taking Melody to Ed’s Shop and allowing her to pick what she wanted to take home. Ed has even agreed a 3rd Date for his Princess”

It isn’t every day that you hear about celebs making such small but incredible acts of kindness like this, but Ed Sheeran has clearly gone above and beyond for the little girl.

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“Ed certainly does have a true bond with Melody,” her mother Karina tells Babble. “We think he is the most down to earth, kind hearted, genuine, talented person anyone could ever wish to meet.”

She’s also incredibly grateful for all that he’s added to the little girl’s life:

“We are so proud he has a big role to play in Melody’s life and how he wants to be in her life. We are so happy he is taking the time to involve himself [and] hope the she is an inspiration to him just as much as he is an inspiration to her. Going by Melody’s reaction towards Ed, she’s completely in love. Happiness oozes out of her when he’s around her.”

Since first meeting Sheeran, Melody’s mom says she’s been on cloud 9.

“Ed brought her an iPad with all his music for her operation she had in January and even sent her two video messages to keep her fighting strong,” Karina shared. “She completely forgets about her medical needs when he is around.”

Karina adds that while the day-to-day realities of caring for a child with critical medical issues is both draining and emotional, her daughter’s happiness is of the utmost importance to her, and Ed’s presence has given her daughter a new reason to fight. In fact, he’s given all of the Driscolls a reason to fight.

“Ed gives us the strength to carry on as parents,” Karina shares. “He makes us think that anything is possible. We stay positive as we know Melody has him fighting in her corner with her. It takes a huge weight off of us to see her so happy.”

Karina has also credited Facebook and Twitter fans with helping her get her daughter’s story out into the world, creating an opportunity for Melody to meet Ed Sheeran in the first place.

“We would like to thank everyone who follows Melody’s journey and gives us all so much support,” she tells Babble. “We hope that Melody shows everyone that miracles do happen, that life is so worth living, and to never ever give up.”

I don’t know about you, but I can’t wait to see what Ed and Melody’s next hang-out will bring.

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May 3, 2017

MCC Celebrates the Spirit of Booth Maternity

Last week the Pennsylvania Historical Commission unveiled a historical marker commemorating Booth __maternity Center at what is now part of St Joseph University’s Campus. This was significant to me and the MCC family in many ways.  MCC supported the application developed by Bill McCool, CNM chair of the Midwifery department, University of PA Nursing School and MCC Policy Committee member to highlight Booth as a nationally recognized innovator and leader in developing family-centered __maternity care and parenting programs. MCC also cosponsored the dedication event because as PA Historical Commission’s Nancy Moses observed – too few historical sites acknowledge the contributions and lives of women, children, and families.

My interest was also personal. I birthed my daughter, Cory at Booth Maternity Center 33 years ago. I was surrounded by close family and friends and assisted by a nurse midwife and my loving husband. With all of that support, it was clear who was in charge. I was expected to make decisions, express my preferences and actively participate in my care. My baby was immediately put on my chest, rooted for my breast and nursed vigorously. Booth was family friendly and breastfeeding friendly. A birth was a significant life experience that could be empowering and spiritual not simply a medical event. It was the beginning of a new life, a defining relationship, and a family journey.

I worked at Booth for five years, directing the parenting program. We supported families in being the best parents they could be by offering childbirth education, peer support through trained parent volunteers, Booth Buddies, ongoing support groups and parent-child play groups. We had a newsletter- the Listening Booth- where parents could voice their interests and concerns and I could spark discussion by chronicling my own developmental challenges of parenting Sage and Cory as infants and toddlers.

What was most remarkable at Booth was that everyone who worked there was committed to the vision and mission. This included the dietary, administrative and housekeeping staff as well as physicians, midwives, social workers, and educators. Parents helped design Booth and helped craft their programs. It was also remarkably diverse. Founders Ruth Wilf and John Franklin intentionally set out to create a hospital that did not distinguish between “clinic’ and “private pay” patients. All insurance was accepted. Families included pregnant teens, highly educated college professors, health care professionals and Muslim women seeking female birth attendants. Booth was truly successful in treating everyone with respect and having the same high-quality care for all.

It was at Booth that I first encountered Maternity Care Coalition. In 1983, I was invited to represent Booth at the then small and mostly volunteer coalition. I remember being eight months pregnant and climbing the steps to the third floor of the office at Welfare Rights organization in North Philadelphia where I attended my first meeting. MCC founder, Sister Teresita Hinnegan and recently hired part-time advocate, Dorothy Jordan greeted me. The agenda was addressing the outrageous infant mortality rates in Philadelphia and the disturbing disparities that had two to three times the number of African –American babies die before their first birthday. What could we do? We agreed to collect data, listen to neighborhood women and mobilize the community to address the problem.

In thinking back to my Booth days, I realized much of what I learned there shaped my values and approach here at MCC. It is most visible in MCC’s Statement of Beliefs. The woman, infant, and family have always been at the center at MCC. “Pregnancy is a state of wellness, birth as normal, and parenting as an opportunity for growth which requires extra support from family and community.” “MCC believes that people should make decisions about their own lives…supports the empowerment of individuals to make changes that improve the quality of their lives using a family-centered approach.” “MCC is committed to services that are inclusive….reaching out to the disenfranchised, impoverished, incarcerated, homeless, undocumented, substance using and victims of domestic violence”.

Booth created a vision and an example of how to support childbearing families. It was advocacy through action. MCC carries that torch today. So it is no surprise that many of Booth’s architects, employees, families, and babies are some of MCC’s greatest supporters and champions. And while the connection between Booth and MCC is not surprising, it is sometimes easy to lose sight of why we what we do, particularly when we are faced with so many challenges and unknowns. Because of this, it is especially important to celebrate the spirit of Booth Maternity and it’s enduring impact on MCC.