If you’re a parent with a Twitter account, chances are you tweet about your kids — and often. Some of the things we’ve seen (the good, the bad, and the very, very ugly) are just begging to be shared, and who has the time for more than 140 characters? Not us. So here you go, the funniest tweets from __parents on Twitter this week. #yourewelcome
1. Good recommendation.
7: are you taking hints for your New Year's resolution?
Me: sure.
7: good, so say yes to us more when we ask for stuff you want to say no to— Mike Reynolds (@EverydayGirlDad) December 27, 2016
2. Trust us, you’re going to need this.
*Friend opening iPad I gave her for her baby shower*
Her: But screentime is-
Me: -Shh
Her: Not until they're 2-
Me: *smothering her* Shhhhhh— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) December 29, 2016
3. __parents will do anything to avoid a tantrum. Anything.
My kid's banana fell on the ground, so excuse me while I perform a quick memorial service.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) December 27, 2016
4. Until next year, advent calendars.
There was no denying 8 was my son as he woke up on Dec 25th, devastated by the thought he would no longer be getting a chocolate every day.
— Carbosly (@Carbosly) December 26, 2016
5. So. gross.
My toddler just drank spoiled milk he found in a sippy cup under the couch.
So yeah, I'll take that nomination for 2016 Mom of the Year.
— MyMomologue (@MyMomologue) December 28, 2016
6. It’s a vicious cycle.
If you give a mom a movie, she's probably going to want 10 cookies to go with it.
And then she's going to want to Google all the cast.
— Walking Outside (@WalkingOutside) December 29, 2016
7. Questionable life choice #372.
Family vacation. So instead of having my hubby in the jacuzzi with me, I have my kids.
And I'm pretty sure at least one of them just peed.
— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) December 24, 2016
8. Close enough.
My wife said she's starting to feel like she wants another baby, so I bought her a Hatchimal.
— Real American Dadass (@R_A_Dadass) December 28, 2016
9. Lolz.
Remember back when we didn't have kids and thought we were busy?
— Stella G. Maddox (@StellaGMaddox) December 30, 2016
10. We need useful information.
Thanks, pregnancy sites. All this focus on carseats but NOTHING about which monsters a T-rex could kill in a fight. My 6yo thinks I'm a fool
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) December 24, 2016
11. Please?
"Children hibernate at some point in the winter, right?"
-parents over Christmas break.— No Idea: Daddy Blog (@byclintedwards) December 23, 2016
12. Seriously, she’s not mad.
The kids were up at 5, but it's cool. I'm not mad.
*aggressively stirs coffee*— Stacey Sordahl (@DrunkAtThePTA) December 27, 2016
13. Get it together, man.
Our family about ready to leave:
My wife: Is that what you're wearing?
Me: Of course not. This is…my getting ready to leave outfit.
— Beau Coffron (@lunchboxdad) December 26, 2016
14. Family time overload.
It's day… "my kid and I are no longer speaking but relying on grunts and hand gestures to communicate"… of winter break.
— Jules (@SaltyCorpse) December 28, 2016
15. That works, too.
If I just stuffed a couple of marshmallows in my kid's mouth I'd probably get a more natural smile for the camera.
— Charlie N Andy (@HowToBeADad) December 25, 2016