As we sat sipping coffee, I prattled on as good friends often do with each other about my day-to-day life as a mama to little ones. I vaguely recollect my girlfriend interrupting me to ask, “Okay, wait. What? What are all these terms you’re using? Tiger Parenting? Helicopter Mom? Attachment Parenting?”
The first thing that came to mind was, “Really? She doesn’t even know what Attachment Parenting is? Yeah right, come on.” We all know that one, regardless of how old our kids are, right?
But that was me, the Millennial Mom, being naive.
You see, my friend is a mom to one teenage boy and a young adult. When her first was wee big she was a single parent with ZERO time and ZERO something-or-others to give about the latest parenting fads, styles, terms, and trends.
Before I go any further, it occurs to me that maybe you don’t know what a helicopter parent is. Basically, the term describes one who flitters about their child’s every move, every interest. Poised to jump into any scenario, whether it be at school, amongst their peers or friends, their teachers, or on the playground. And I’m not just talking about parents who are over-protective, but it’s a little bit of that. When it’s extreme. a helicopter parent has no shame. They will do anything and everything to make sure their child gets ahead academically, whether or not their child deserves it. This has especially become problematic in higher education, where parents hover to the point of filling out their child’s job applications, school applications, finishing their assignments, accompanying them to job fairs, harassing teachers when their child doesn’t get a good grade, and so on.
This happens in the early years too, of course, and it annoys the ever-loving bejeezus out of me.
So even if you didn’t know there was a name for it, you know the type I’m sure. That kindergarten kid who raised $1k for their schools Jump Rope For Heart or whatever? You know he didn’t fundraise all that coin themselves. Harmless? Maybe. But I’m willing to eat my shirt if that type of parent doesn’t indeed turn out to be the one writing their kid’s papers and doing their homework. Helicopter Parents gotta start interfering somewhere, and the playground is my looking glass these days.
As much as I love my kids, I try to use logic when my overwhelming desire to step into a situation threatens to hinder my critical thinking. Using love and logic may or or may not have an ideological bias as far as my own parenting style, but I know one thing for sure, I’m not doing my kid any favors by intruding on any and all altercations on the playground — and eventually job applications and academic deadlines.
When we become parents we want our children to succeed. We try to do everything we can to teach them how. Doing it all for them however, and not allowing them to take their own risks can only hinder that development and I’m avoiding it at all costs! What about you?
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More Babbles From Selena …
Selena is a crafty, culinary mom. Part-time mischief maker, all-the-time geek. Find her elsewhere on the Internets, mastering in general mayhem.